Sunday, 21 June 2009
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Although my stupid headache plagued me from 1pm-6am, I was very very happy yesterday
Honestly, I really gave up hope and the thought that I would be posting such a post or experiencing such a thing. It seemed mildly possible to me, seeing the way we were changing so quickly. Things have been going down ever since Brave Souls broke up. We were uncomfortable with all the new unfamiliar people coming in, but I'm really very happy to have all of you now. In the past, I was sure I wouldn't be saying something like that because we kept telling ourselves, Brave Souls is gone and such a big group will never feel the same. But all of you proved me wrong really. Now it's like happiness doubled.
I said I'm happy that we're making a U-turn. Actually we aren't, we're not turning back. Nobody can turn back time, and everything else. We're moving forward, and that's even better actually.
It feels really really good. You know how we always used to say that friends were like our foundation, something for us to fall back on when everything else goes wrong. Through this whole period, we were still each other's foundation, just that we were clouded by so many things like new things to try, more adventurous things to do, the thrill in pushing the limits further and further. It's all part of growing up I agree (that's why I never nag much okay haha). Now that some of us fell, it made us all realize that we were all still there to catch each other. And it feels great to be reassured that all of you are still here, the same way you all used to be. The last time I felt like that, was before Brave Souls broke up, which is like what, eons ago (around Sec 3?).
All of us are so different. Korwoong who has warped humour (ha ha) RC, laugh. Justin Kor and Norman, who are obsessed with doing bicep curls. Weiping and Junwen who would do anything to keep their long hair. Ahmad who has countless classic moments. Minghong's "You pay half then you eat" haha. Brian's weird jokes and laughter. Chishun's letter and speeches (that are awesome). Joseph's weird reactions. Brandan's weirdness and innate capability to detach himself from whatever's happening haha. And me being a carebear (according to Junwen) and an annoying and restricting naggy bitch. But yet, there's something in us that's so alike. Something in us that's so different from everyone else. I spent practically my whole teenage life with you people, and I'm happy I did.
It felt really bad when I knew most of you did not agree with me about the things we were doing and the way we were changing. I thought all of you changed so much that we didn't know each other anymore. But I was really touched yesterday when Chishun read the part about hoping I was smiling at that point in time. I was. I'm sorry if I lost faith in you all at any point in time, whatever has happened and whatever will happen in the future will only serve to make our friendship stronger.
I feel so liberated and I haven't said this in a LONG LONG time but,
I love my friends
I love all of you, and there's no longer a need to compare to the past, I love you all even more than before now.
I'm home.
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